What if... Trump, Musk & Jesus compete for the minds and souls!

Published: 01 February 2025
on channel: SpotLight on Life and Business

"Second Coming… With a Twist!"

The world held its breath as a blinding light appeared over Times Square. A booming voice echoed, "BEHOLD, I HAVE RETURNED!"
Cameras turned, influencers went live, and news anchors fumbled their papers. As the light dimmed, there stood… Donald J. Trump.
"I hate to say I told you so, but folks, I TOLD YOU SO. They said I wasn’t divine—WRONG! I walked on water at Mar-a-Lago, believe me, everyone saw it. The best Messiah, maybe ever."
The crowd gasped. A CNN reporter fainted. Evangelicals cheered. Atheists rebooted their belief systems.
But just as people were getting used to Trump-as-Jesus, another light exploded in the sky. Elon Musk floated down in a cybernetic halo.
"Actually, I am Jesus 2.0," he announced. "I have returned, and this time, we’re making Heaven interplanetary. Starship will take the faithful to Mars. No sinners allowed."
Trump scoffed. "Mars? Sad. My Heaven is way better. It has golf courses. The best gold, let me tell you."
Then, ANOTHER beam of light struck the ground. Out stepped a bearded man in carpenter overalls. The original Jesus.
He sighed. "What in my Father's name is going on here?"
Elon and Trump froze. "Uh… nothing?"
Jesus rubbed his temples. "I leave for 2,000 years and come back to this?! Okay, let’s start over. Who’s still good at fishing?"

And thus, the Third Testament began.

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